Therapy for men · Telehealth across California

You don’t have to hold it all in.

Therapy for men, and especially for gay and queer men, who are tired of handling everything alone. A confidential space by video, anywhere in California, to say what you actually feel and decide for yourself what kind of man you want to be.

Request a Free Consultation How it works

Strength isn’t the absence of feeling. It’s being able to stay with what you feel, and still choose how you act.

Pavlo O’Connor, LMFT · Lic# 158740

Many men were taught, early and often, that feelings are a weakness and asking for help is a failure. Those rules can keep you functioning for years.

They can also keep you lonely, on edge, or stuck in the same arguments. For gay and queer men, there is often another layer: years of watching how you come across, sometimes even within your own community.

Therapy with me is a place to question those rules without being judged for having followed them.

Sound Familiar?

Capable on the outside, alone with it inside.

The Work

Redefining what it means
to be a man.

Together we look at the rules about masculinity you picked up from family, culture, and sometimes the gay community itself, and decide which ones still serve you. My style is warm but direct. My approach is integrative, drawing on psychodynamic, cognitive, narrative, and humanistic work, and explicitly affirming of gay, bi, queer, and trans clients.

01

What we can work on

  • Opening up emotionally and saying what you need
  • Anger, stress, and burnout
  • Intimacy, dating, and relationship patterns
  • Shame, self-worth, and identity
  • Coming out, breakups, and other transitions
  • Family expectations and old messages about being a man
02

How to start

  • Request a consultation through my secure form
  • We talk for 20 minutes, free, to see if we’re a good fit
  • If we are, we schedule your first 50-minute session
  • Sessions are by secure video, anywhere in California
  • Individual sessions, or couples sessions with a partner

Fees & Logistics

Clear fees,
no surprises.

Sessions are private pay. If you’d like to use insurance, ask about your options during the free consultation.

A limited number of sliding scale spots are available for clients with financial need. If you are paying privately, you can ask for a Good Faith Estimate at any time.

FAQ

Before we begin.

If something isn’t answered here, ask me during the consultation.

Do I need to be in crisis to start therapy?+

No. Many men start because something no longer feels sustainable, not because everything has fallen apart.

Do you only work with gay men?+

No. I work with men of all orientations. Gay and queer men are a particular focus of my practice.

What if I don’t know what to talk about?+

That’s common. You don’t need the right words or a clear goal to begin. Part of the work is figuring that out together.

Is what I share confidential?+

Yes, with legally mandated exceptions, which I explain at the start of our work together. Sessions take place over a secure video platform.

Contact

A small step
is still a step.

Reach out to schedule a free 20-minute consultation or to ask questions. There is no commitment in making contact.

Request a consultation.

All initial contact is handled securely through my practice portal, in accordance with HIPAA guidelines. Please don’t include personal health details in your first message.

Request a Consultation

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If you are in crisis or thinking about harming yourself, call or text 988, or call 911.